{"id":8083,"date":"2025-01-25T09:47:16","date_gmt":"2025-01-25T09:47:16","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bangbang.md\/?p=8083"},"modified":"2025-01-26T10:03:46","modified_gmt":"2025-01-26T10:03:46","slug":"nu-esti-pe-placul-meu-cum-am-ajuns-la-ambulanta-tomografie-si-consultatii-la-neurolog","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bangbang.md\/ru\/2025\/01\/25\/nu-esti-pe-placul-meu-cum-am-ajuns-la-ambulanta-tomografie-si-consultatii-la-neurolog\/","title":{"rendered":"\u201eNu e\u0219ti pe placul meu.\u201d Cum am ajuns la ambulan\u021b\u0103, tomografie \u0219i consulta\u021bii la neurolog\u00a0"},"content":{"rendered":"

Demult nu am mai scris despre experien\u021bele mele queer<\/em>, a\u0219a c\u0103 m-am g\u00e2ndit s\u0103 \u00eemp\u0103rt\u0103\u0219esc dou\u0103 \u00eent\u00e2mpl\u0103ri \u00een care mi s-a spus: \u201eScuz\u0103, dar nu e\u0219ti pe placul meu.\u201d Aceste cazuri au avut loc \u00eentr-o perioad\u0103 \u00een care \u00eenc\u0103 nu \u0219tiam cum s\u0103 m\u0103 comport cu b\u0103ie\u021bii gay \u0219i nici la ce s\u0103 m\u0103 a\u0219tept de la ei.<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

\u201eCarbon\u201d, \u201eGheorghe Asachi\u201d, Valea Morilor<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

Despre aceast\u0103 \u00eent\u00e2mplare am povestit sumar \u00eentr-un alt articol<\/mark><\/strong><\/a>, dar acum voi oferi mai multe detalii.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Era \u00eenceputul lunii octombrie 2022. M\u0103 duceam la Palatul Na\u021bional \u201eNicolae Sulac\u201d la premiera \u00eenchis\u0103 a filmului Carbon<\/mark><\/a> <\/strong>\u0219i \u00eentr-un moment \u00eemi scrie un t\u00e2n\u0103r pe Grindr. Conversa\u021bia a \u00eenceput obi\u0219nuit: \u201eCum te nume\u0219ti? C\u00e2\u021bi ani ai? Ce interese ai?\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Dup\u0103 aceast\u0103 faz\u0103 birocratic\u0103, discu\u021bia a devenit mai lejer\u0103 \u0219i am continuat s\u0103 vorbim pe Telegram. Acolo mi-a trimis c\u00e2teva poze (doar ale fe\u021bei) \u0219i, pe un ton st\u00e2njenit, m-a \u00eentrebat dac\u0103 \u00eel consider simpatic \u0219i dac\u0103 este pe gustul meu. I-am r\u0103spuns afirmativ, dup\u0103 care conversa\u021biile noastre au devenit mult mai deschise.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A doua zi, ne-am \u00eent\u00e2lnit la ora 18.15 \u00een fa\u021ba liceului \u201eGheorghe Asachi\u201d. De acolo, am mers \u00eempreun\u0103 \u00een parcul Valea Morilor. Pe drum, discu\u021biile curgeau firesc, de parc\u0103 eram prieteni vechi care nu se mai v\u0103zuser\u0103 de mult timp. Am vorbit despre ocupa\u021bii, hobbyuri, filme preferate \u0219i multe altele. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

La un moment dat, am realizat c\u0103 avem foarte multe interese comune. Pentru mine, \u00een acel moment, a fost un adev\u0103rat jackpot. P\u00e2n\u0103 la acea \u00eent\u00e2lnire, nu mai avusesem o astfel de experien\u021b\u0103 pe Grindr. Am stat \u00een parc p\u00e2n\u0103 aproape de ora 22.00. Conversa\u021bia nu p\u0103rea s\u0103 se termine, iar senza\u021bia era c\u0103 niciunul dintre noi nu voia s\u0103 plece.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201eVin cu tata \u0219i fratele s\u0103 te ajut\u0103m.\u201d<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

Dup\u0103 c\u00e2teva zile de conversa\u021bii pe Telegram, i-am spus c\u0103 \u201eazi trebuie s\u0103 m\u0103 mut la noua chirie\u201d \u0219i l-am \u00eentrebat, mai mult \u00een glum\u0103, dac\u0103 poate veni s\u0103 m\u0103 ajute s\u0103 transport lucrurile personale. Pe atunci, ele erau depozitate la birou. Spre surprinderea mea, el a r\u0103spuns imediat: \u201eAcu\u0219 vin cu tata \u0219i fratele meu cu ma\u0219ina, s\u0103 te ajut\u0103m s\u0103 transpor\u021bi lucrurile la casa nou\u0103.\u201d Am r\u0103mas uimit \u2013 ne cuno\u0219team de doar c\u00e2teva zile, iar el deja \u201e\u00eemi face cuno\u0219tin\u021b\u0103 cu tata\u201d (glumesc, desigur).<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Toat\u0103 luna octombrie am continuat s\u0103 ne cunoa\u0219tem. \u00cemi povestea despre familia sa, despre frica de a le spune c\u0103 este gay \u0219i despre alte g\u00e2nduri personale. La r\u00e2ndul meu, \u00eei \u00eemp\u0103rt\u0103\u0219eam p\u0103r\u021bi din via\u021ba mea, \u00een ritmul natural al unei rela\u021bii de prietenie \u00een formare. M\u0103 bucuram s\u0103 descop\u0103r un om bun, receptiv \u0219i \u00een\u021beleg\u0103tor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Cadouri de ziua de na\u0219tere<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

De ziua mea de na\u0219tere, dup\u0103 lec\u021biile de canto, i-am propus s\u0103 ne \u00eent\u00e2lnim \u00een centrul ora\u0219ului. Voiam s\u0103-l v\u0103d \u0219i s\u0103-i d\u0103ruiesc un Kinder. Nu \u0219tia c\u0103 este o zi special\u0103 pentru mine. A doua zi, \u00eens\u0103, a venit la mine acas\u0103 cu un pachet mare de la Metro. Mi-a adus mai multe lucruri utile \u0219i faine: o pomp\u0103 pentru ro\u021bile bicicletei, c\u00e2teva perechi de \u0219osete cu tematic\u0103 de Anul Nou, o tastatur\u0103 pentru PC (\u0219tia c\u0103 cea veche e defect\u0103) \u0219i alte m\u0103run\u021bi\u0219uri. Gestul lui m-a emo\u021bionat profund \u2013 nu m\u0103 a\u0219teptam la a\u0219a ceva.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Totu\u0219i, atitudinea lui s-a schimbat brusc dup\u0103 acea vizit\u0103. Am observat cum devenea din ce \u00een ce mai distant, g\u0103sea diverse motive pentru a evita \u00eent\u00e2lnirile. Am \u00een\u021beles rapid ce \u00eenseamn\u0103 asta. \u00centr-o discu\u021bie, mi-a spus c\u0103 \u201enu este preg\u0103tit pentru rela\u021bii serioase\u201d \u0219i c\u0103 \u201ear fi mai bine s\u0103 r\u0103m\u00e2nem prieteni f\u0103r\u0103 obliga\u021bii.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Aceast\u0103 reac\u021bie m-a dezam\u0103git, mai ales c\u0103 nici m\u0103car nu vorbeam despre rela\u021bii serioase. Era o simpl\u0103 prietenie care se contura firesc, pe m\u0103sur\u0103 ce descopeream interese comune. I-am explicat c\u0103 prefer s\u0103 nu ne mai vedem deloc, deoarece motivele invocate de el echivalau, \u00een opinia mea, cu \u201eNu vreau s\u0103 ne mai vedem.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Mi-a amintit de o experien\u021b\u0103 anterioar\u0103, c\u00e2nd fosta mea prieten\u0103 mi-a spus \u201eHai s\u0103 lu\u0103m o pauz\u0103\u201d \u2013 un alt mod de a spune \u201egata\u201d. Aici<\/mark><\/a> <\/mark><\/strong>am povestit despre asta. Sunt genul de persoan\u0103 care prefer\u0103 totul sau nimic. Rela\u021biile \u201epe jum\u0103tate\u201d nu sunt pentru mine. Astfel, la mijlocul lunii noiembrie, am \u00eencetat s\u0103 mai discut\u0103m.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201eOpera\u021biunea special\u0103\u201d<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

\u00cen decembrie, am intrat din nou pe Grindr \u0219i i-am scris unui utilizator. Dup\u0103 ce i-am trimis poza mea, m-a blocat imediat. Stop. Eu a\u0219a nu m\u0103 joc. Am decis s\u0103 intru de pe al doilea cont \u0219i s\u0103-i scriu din nou, pref\u0103c\u00e2ndu-m\u0103 alt\u0103 persoan\u0103. Eram curios s\u0103 aflu cine poate fi at\u00e2t de needucat. Am ini\u021biat conversa\u021bia \u0219i i-am trimis c\u00e2teva poze, iar el mi-a trimis pozele lui. \u00cen acel moment, mi-am dat seama cine era \u2013 el, protagonistul acestei istorii.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

M-am sim\u021bit umilit \u0219i voiam s\u0103-l \u00eentreb ce i-am f\u0103cut c\u0103 \u0219i-a schimbat p\u0103rerea despre mine \u0219i de ce a ales s\u0103 m\u0103 blocheze. A\u0219a c\u0103 am apelat la al treilea cont. De data aceasta, m-am prezentat ca fiind persoana pe care o blocase ini\u021bial, f\u0103r\u0103 s\u0103-i spun c\u0103 \u0219tiu cine este. L-am \u00eentrebat direct: \u201eDe ce m-ai blocat?\u201d. Planul meu era s\u0103-i dezv\u0103lui c\u0103 \u0219tiu cine este \u0219i s\u0103 discut\u0103m. Pentru mine asta era important. \u00cens\u0103, r\u0103spunsul lui a fost simplu \u0219i dur: \u201eTu nu e\u0219ti pe placul meu\u201d. Imediat dup\u0103 aceea, m-a blocat din nou, \u00eenainte s\u0103 mai pot spune ceva.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Am r\u0103mas f\u0103r\u0103 cuvinte. Decep\u021bia a fost at\u00e2t de puternic\u0103 \u00eenc\u00e2t mi-a afectat starea de s\u0103n\u0103tate. M\u0103 b\u00e2ntuia o \u00eentrebare: \u201eC\u00e2nd a fost sincer: atunci c\u00e2nd \u00eemi spunea c\u0103 \u00eei plac \u0219i \u00eei este bine cu mine, sau acum?\u201d.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Aceste g\u00e2nduri m-au m\u0103cinat zile \u00eentregi, p\u00e2n\u0103 c\u00e2nd am ajuns s\u0103 am o migren\u0103 sever\u0103. Nu aveam poft\u0103 de m\u00e2ncare, iar dac\u0103 \u00eencercam s\u0103 m\u0103n\u00e2nc, vomitam imediat. Durerile de cap erau insuportabile, iar injec\u021biile administrate de ambulan\u021b\u0103 aveau efect doar pentru c\u00e2teva ore. Lumina \u00eemi provoca dureri de ochi, iar lucrul devenise imposibil.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Am mers la un spital privat pentru a face o tomografie, tem\u00e2ndu-m\u0103 c\u0103 ar putea fi ceva grav. Rezultatele au ar\u0103tat c\u0103 sunt s\u0103n\u0103tos, iar neurologul mi-a spus c\u0103 am o migren\u0103 sever\u0103.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

M-a ajutat s\u0103 ies din aceast\u0103 stare un prieten, care mi-a spus: \u201eE normal ca unii oameni s\u0103-\u021bi zic\u0103 azi una \u0219i m\u00e2ine alta. Nu te mai consuma pentru asta.\u201d A doua zi, m-am trezit f\u0103r\u0103 dureri de cap.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

\u201eE\u0219ti prea moale la caracter.\u201d<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

La sf\u00e2r\u0219itul lunii decembrie 2022, i-am scris unui b\u0103iat pe Grindr. Dup\u0103 c\u00e2teva discu\u021bii lejere, am stabilit s\u0103 ne vedem. Chiar de la prima \u00eent\u00e2lnire i-am spus c\u0103 inten\u021bionez s\u0103 m\u0103 mut \u00een februarie \u2013 o informa\u021bie pe care am \u00eemp\u0103rt\u0103\u0219it-o doar ca s\u0103 umplu un moment de t\u0103cere. Spre surprinderea mea, el mi-a r\u0103spuns: \u201e\u00cen februarie, prietena mea pleac\u0103 \u0219i po\u021bi veni la mine\u201d.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

El \u00eenchiria un apartament cu dou\u0103 camere, iar una dintre ele urma s\u0103 se elibereze. I-am zis \u201ebine\u201d \u0219i, p\u00e2n\u0103 s\u0103 m\u0103 mut, am continuat s\u0103 discut\u0103m regulat. Totul p\u0103rea s\u0103 fie \u00een regul\u0103.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

C\u00e2nd m-am mutat, \u00eentr-o zi st\u0103team \u00eempreun\u0103 \u00een camera lui \u0219i discutam despre ceva \u2013 nu mai \u021bin minte exact ce. La un moment dat, i-am spus: \u201eTu mie \u00eemi placi. Ce zici dac\u0103 am fi mai mult dec\u00e2t prieteni?\u201d. R\u0103spunsul lui a fost tran\u0219ant: \u201eScuze, dar tu e\u0219ti prea moale la caracter. Mie \u00eemi plac b\u0103ie\u021bi mai b\u0103rb\u0103to\u0219i\u201d. M-a \u00eentristat pu\u021bin ceea ce mi-a spus, dar, pe de alt\u0103 parte, i-am dat dreptate. Nu sunt genul de persoan\u0103 agresiv\u0103 sau autoritar\u0103 \u2013 exact tr\u0103s\u0103turile pe care le aveau fo\u0219tii s\u0103i parteneri, din pove\u0219tile pe care mi le \u00eemp\u0103rt\u0103\u0219ise.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Am continuat s\u0103 locuim \u00eempreun\u0103 timp de dou\u0103 luni, aparent \u00een armonie. \u00centr-o zi, mi-a scris pe Telegram c\u0103 vrea s\u0103 avem o discu\u021bie serioas\u0103 \u00een acea sear\u0103. M\u0103 \u00eentrebam ce ar putea s\u0103-mi spun\u0103. Oare avea s\u0103-mi zic\u0103 c\u0103 nu-i place s\u0103 locuiasc\u0103 cu mine sau c\u0103 am f\u0103cut ceva gre\u0219it?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

C\u00e2nd seara am venit, am intrat \u00een camera lui. Lumina era stins\u0103, doar ni\u0219te becule\u021be creau o atmosfer\u0103 cald\u0103. El st\u0103tea ghemuit \u00een col\u021bul patului, privindu-\u0219i m\u00e2inile, cu o voce timid\u0103. Mi-a spus: \u201eTu mie \u00eemi placi.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Am r\u0103mas \u0219ocat. Nu m-am a\u0219teptat la o schimbare at\u00e2t de radical\u0103 \u00een sentimentele sale. M-am ridicat de pe scaun, m-am apropiat de el, l-am \u00eembr\u0103\u021bi\u0219at \u0219i i-am r\u0103spuns: \u201eScuze, dar data trecut\u0103 mi-ai spus c\u0103 nu sunt pe placul t\u0103u. Cu timpul, mi-am inhibat sentimentele, iar acum nu mai simt nimic\u201d. I-am mul\u021bumit pentru sinceritatea lui \u0219i am ie\u0219it din camer\u0103. O lun\u0103 mai t\u00e2rziu, m-am mutat din acel apartament. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u0218ti\u021bi care este diferen\u021ba dintre ace\u0219ti doi protagoni\u0219ti? Primul nu a avut curajul s\u0103-mi spun\u0103 motivul \u201edesp\u0103r\u021birii\u201d, \u00een timp ce al doilea a avut acest curaj, iar din acest motiv, \u00een prezent, suntem \u00een rela\u021bii bune. Am\u00e2ndoi am fost capabili s\u0103 explic\u0103m motivul \u201eDe ce tu nu e\u0219ti pe placul meu\u201d. Privind \u00een urm\u0103, cred c\u0103 niciunul dintre noi nu avea suficient\u0103 maturitate emo\u021bional\u0103 pentru a face fa\u021b\u0103 noilor experien\u021be romantice \u0219i, pur \u0219i simplu, nu era momentul potrivit.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Lec\u021biile \u00eenv\u0103\u021bate<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

Aceste dou\u0103 experien\u021be m-au maturizat \u0219i mi-au oferit o lec\u021bie valoroas\u0103: s\u0103 nu a\u0219tept deschidere de la al\u021bi oameni at\u00e2ta timp c\u00e2t ei tr\u0103iesc \u00een fric\u0103 \u0219i nesiguran\u021b\u0103. \u0218i s\u0103 accept cu u\u0219urin\u021b\u0103 decizia lor brusc\u0103 de a disp\u0103rea f\u0103r\u0103 explica\u021bii.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Majoritatea b\u0103ie\u021bilor \u201elocked\u201d (care stau \u00eenc\u0103 \u201e\u00een dulap\u201d) cred c\u0103 \u00ee\u0219i doresc o rela\u021bie. Dar, \u00een momentul \u00een care prietenia \u00eencepe s\u0103 treac\u0103 la un alt nivel, se sperie \u0219i dispar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Iubi\u021bi \u0219i nu provoca\u021bi durere celor din jur.<\/strong><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Demult nu am mai scris despre experien\u021bele mele queer, a\u0219a c\u0103 m-am g\u00e2ndit s\u0103 \u00eemp\u0103rt\u0103\u0219esc dou\u0103 \u00eent\u00e2mpl\u0103ri \u00een care mi…<\/p>","protected":false},"author":11,"featured_media":8085,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[179,178],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-8083","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-lumea-noastra","category-queer-proud"],"yoast_head":"\n\u201eNu e\u0219ti pe placul meu.\u201d Cum am ajuns la ambulan\u021b\u0103, tomografie \u0219i consulta\u021bii la neurolog\u00a0 - BANG-BANG<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/bangbang.md\/ru\/2025\/01\/25\/nu-esti-pe-placul-meu-cum-am-ajuns-la-ambulanta-tomografie-si-consultatii-la-neurolog\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"ru_RU\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"\u201eNu e\u0219ti pe placul meu.\u201d Cum am ajuns la ambulan\u021b\u0103, tomografie \u0219i consulta\u021bii la neurolog\u00a0\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Demult nu am mai scris despre experien\u021bele mele queer, a\u0219a c\u0103 m-am g\u00e2ndit s\u0103 \u00eemp\u0103rt\u0103\u0219esc dou\u0103 \u00eent\u00e2mpl\u0103ri \u00een care mi...\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/bangbang.md\/ru\/2025\/01\/25\/nu-esti-pe-placul-meu-cum-am-ajuns-la-ambulanta-tomografie-si-consultatii-la-neurolog\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"BANG-BANG\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/bangbangmoldova\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2025-01-25T09:47:16+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2025-01-26T10:03:46+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/bangbang.md\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/01\/322494827_5708368782533882_4618088855128713624_n-1.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"952\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"730\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Liubomir Gutu\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"\u041d\u0430\u043f\u0438\u0441\u0430\u043d\u043e \u0430\u0432\u0442\u043e\u0440\u043e\u043c\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Liubomir Gutu\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"\u041f\u0440\u0438\u043c\u0435\u0440\u043d\u043e\u0435 \u0432\u0440\u0435\u043c\u044f \u0434\u043b\u044f \u0447\u0442\u0435\u043d\u0438\u044f\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"9 \u043c\u0438\u043d\u0443\u0442\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/bangbang.md\/2025\/01\/25\/nu-esti-pe-placul-meu-cum-am-ajuns-la-ambulanta-tomografie-si-consultatii-la-neurolog\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/bangbang.md\/2025\/01\/25\/nu-esti-pe-placul-meu-cum-am-ajuns-la-ambulanta-tomografie-si-consultatii-la-neurolog\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Liubomir Gutu\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/bangbang.md\/#\/schema\/person\/b4ff4d5c9f0016ac2c271c7f56fe821a\"},\"headline\":\"\u201eNu e\u0219ti pe placul meu.\u201d Cum am ajuns la ambulan\u021b\u0103, tomografie \u0219i consulta\u021bii la neurolog\u00a0\",\"datePublished\":\"2025-01-25T09:47:16+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2025-01-26T10:03:46+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/bangbang.md\/2025\/01\/25\/nu-esti-pe-placul-meu-cum-am-ajuns-la-ambulanta-tomografie-si-consultatii-la-neurolog\/\"},\"wordCount\":1822,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/bangbang.md\/#organization\"},\"articleSection\":[\"Lumea noastr\u0103\",\"Queer & Proud\"],\"inLanguage\":\"ru-RU\"},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/bangbang.md\/2025\/01\/25\/nu-esti-pe-placul-meu-cum-am-ajuns-la-ambulanta-tomografie-si-consultatii-la-neurolog\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/bangbang.md\/2025\/01\/25\/nu-esti-pe-placul-meu-cum-am-ajuns-la-ambulanta-tomografie-si-consultatii-la-neurolog\/\",\"name\":\"\u201eNu e\u0219ti pe placul meu.\u201d Cum am ajuns la ambulan\u021b\u0103, tomografie \u0219i consulta\u021bii la neurolog\u00a0 - 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