{"id":6968,"date":"2024-09-24T09:04:26","date_gmt":"2024-09-24T09:04:26","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bangbang.md\/?p=6968"},"modified":"2024-09-24T09:04:27","modified_gmt":"2024-09-24T09:04:27","slug":"editorial-babe-speriate-si-gay-cuminti-cum-homofobia-ne-afecteaza-pe-toti","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bangbang.md\/ru\/2024\/09\/24\/editorial-babe-speriate-si-gay-cuminti-cum-homofobia-ne-afecteaza-pe-toti\/","title":{"rendered":"| Editorial | \u201eBabe speriate \u0219i gay cumin\u021bi\u201d – cum homofobia ne afecteaz\u0103 pe to\u021bi"},"content":{"rendered":"

\u201eNu \u0219tiu dac\u0103 ai v\u0103zut deschiderea \u00een totalitate a Jocurilor Olimpice, sincer, asta a fost perebor (prea mult, n.r.) cu Gay!\u201d <\/em>Asta mi-a spus un cunoscut gay zilele trecute. Este clar c\u0103 acest \u201eprea mult\u201d reprezint\u0103, de fapt, \u00eencercarea persoanelor queer vizibile de normalizare a diversit\u0103\u021bii. Lucru pentru care mul\u021bi dintre noi lupt\u0103 de mul\u021bi ani.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Argumentul c\u0103 uneori este \u201eprea mult\u201d nu \u00eemi este deloc str\u0103in. Totu\u0219i, aceste cuvinte mi-au l\u0103sat un gust amar, mai ales c\u0103 vin din gura cuiva care tr\u0103ie\u0219te aceea\u0219i realitate homofob\u0103.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

De ce unii dintre noi cred c\u0103 prezen\u021ba \u0219i vizibilitatea noastr\u0103 public\u0103 ar trebui s\u0103 fie limitate? R\u0103spunsul este unul pe c\u00e2t de simplu, pe at\u00e2t de dureros. Homofobia, \u00een special cea internalizat\u0103, ne face s\u0103 credem c\u0103 acceptarea noastr\u0103 ar trebui s\u0103 fie discret\u0103, ba chiar invizibil\u0103, \u00een loc s\u0103 fie o manifestare fireasc\u0103 a identit\u0103\u021bii noastre.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Faptul c\u0103 suntem percepu\u021bi ca fiind diferi\u021bi de ceea ce se consider\u0103 normalitate, <\/em>provoac\u0103 \u00een noi o ru\u0219ine at\u00e2t de mare \u00eenc\u00e2t devenim propriul nostru opresor. \u201ePrea mult b\u0103gat pe g\u00e2t… \u0219i asta sperie babele din biserici. Trebuie mai mult calm \u0219i ar\u0103tat c\u0103 sunt gay ca mine, cumin\u021bi,\u201d mi-a mai zis el, av\u00e2nd \u00een vedere momentele c\u00e2nd vizibilitatea comunit\u0103\u021bii LGBTQ+ devine un subiect public.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ideea c\u0103 trebuie s\u0103 fim cumin\u021bi, s\u0103 ne ascundem diferen\u021bele \u0219i s\u0103 ne conform\u0103m unei imagini \u201eacceptabile\u201d pentru a nu deranja pe nimeni reprezint\u0103 un mecanism de compensare a ru\u0219inii pe care o sim\u021bim zi de zi \u00eentr-o lume predominant cis-heterosexual\u0103.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ru\u0219inea de sine \u0219i Sinele fals<\/em><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

\u00cen terapie am \u00eenv\u0103\u021bat c\u0103 ru\u0219inea nu ne apar\u021bine niciodat\u0103 \u2014 subliniez, NICIODAT\u0102. Aceast\u0103 emo\u021bie intens\u0103 are scopul de a controla \u0219i regla comportamentul social al indivizilor \u00eentr-o societate. Societatea \u0219i familia ne spun c\u0103 a fi gay este gre\u0219it, \u00eens\u0103 acest lucru se bazeaz\u0103 doar pe prejudec\u0103\u021bi.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Alan Downs, psiholog, autor \u0219i activist queer, cunoscut pentru contribu\u021biile sale \u00een domeniul s\u0103n\u0103t\u0103\u021bii mintale \u0219i al comunit\u0103\u021bii LGBTQ+, descrie \u00een cartea sa The Velvet Rage<\/em> stadiile prin care multe persoane LGBTQ+ trec \u00een \u00eencercarea de a naviga prin ru\u0219inea internalizat\u0103 cauzat\u0103 de homofobie.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Citind cartea, am \u00een\u021beles mai bine impactul homofobiei asupra dezvolt\u0103rii identit\u0103\u021bii gay, precum \u0219i modul \u00een care aceasta influen\u021beaz\u0103 rela\u021biile \u0219i s\u0103n\u0103tatea emo\u021bional\u0103 a persoanelor queer.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Prima etap\u0103 a ru\u0219inii, conform autorului, este negarea identit\u0103\u021bii. \u00cen aceast\u0103 faz\u0103, ru\u0219inea se manifest\u0103 printr-un efort intens de a controla atrac\u021biile \u0219i sentimentele, adesea pentru a ne conforma a\u0219tept\u0103rilor heteronormative ale familiei \u0219i societ\u0103\u021bii. \u00cen acest stadiu, mul\u021bi dintre noi dezvolt\u0103 un \u201esine fals\u201d pentru a supravie\u021bui.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Experien\u021ba de a fi diferit \u0219i, mai apoi, de a fi supus \u0219i exclus pentru ceea ce e\u0219ti \u201e\u00eei determin\u0103 pe mul\u021bi b\u0103rba\u021bi gay s\u0103 creeze un sine fals pe care \u00eel prezint\u0103 lumii pentru a se sim\u021bi iubi\u021bi \u0219i accepta\u021bi.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Anume \u00een aceast\u0103 faz\u0103 \u00eencepem procesul de interiorizare a atitudinilor homofobe, iar \u00een c\u0103utarea noastr\u0103 constant\u0103 de validare din exterior, \u00eencerc\u0103m s\u0103 fim normali <\/em>\u0219i s\u0103 ac\u021bion\u0103m conform normelor sociale dominante.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Dup\u0103 cum afirm\u0103 Alan Downs, \u201ene str\u0103duim s\u0103 fim accepta\u021bi.\u201d Aceast\u0103 \u00eencercare de a fi \u201dcumin\u021bi,\u201d dup\u0103 cum sugereaz\u0103 \u0219i prietenul meu, este zadarnic\u0103 pentru c\u0103 \u00eenseamn\u0103 \u201es\u0103 neg\u0103m cine suntem cu adev\u0103rat.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ce \u00eenseamn\u0103 s\u0103 fii un \u201egay cuminte\u201d? <\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Oare aceasta presupune s\u0103 nu-\u021bi revendici drepturile sau s\u0103 nu te afi\u0219ezi \u201eprea mult\u201d, pentru a nu-i speria pe cei care ne atac\u0103 constant?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Homofobia internalizat\u0103 nu doar c\u0103 ne face s\u0103 ne sim\u021bim vinova\u021bi pentru cine suntem, ci ne impune \u0219i o limitare a modului nostru de a exista. Mesajul este clar: po\u021bi s\u0103 fii gay, dar doar dac\u0103 e\u0219ti pe t\u0103cute, doar dac\u0103 nu deranjezi \u0219i doar dac\u0103 \u00ee\u021bi ascunzi adev\u0103rata identitate sub o masc\u0103 care s\u0103 nu provoace disconfort.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Acest proces descrie tranzi\u021bia \u00een al doilea stadiu al ru\u0219inii, c\u00e2nd c\u0103ut\u0103m s\u0103 g\u0103sim validare extern\u0103, indiferent de pre\u021b. Credem c\u0103, dac\u0103 suntem destul de cumin\u021bi sau ne integr\u0103m perfect \u00een a\u0219tept\u0103rile celor din jur, vom primi acea acceptare. \u00cen realitate, aceast\u0103 c\u0103utare a valid\u0103rii externe este un efort zadarnic, deoarece nu vom g\u0103si niciodat\u0103 pacea interioar\u0103 dac\u0103 ne baz\u0103m pe ceilal\u021bi.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Aceast\u0103 etap\u0103 este adesea marcat\u0103 de e\u0219ecuri emo\u021bionale \u0219i rela\u021bionale, deoarece efortul de a construi un \u201esine perfect\u201d este imposibil de men\u021binut, iar validarea extern\u0103 nu poate umple golul l\u0103sat de lipsa accept\u0103rii de sine.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Aceast\u0103 compensare psihologic\u0103 este bine reflectat\u0103 \u00een cuvintele lui Downs: \u201eCu c\u00e2t alerg\u0103m mai tare dup\u0103 aprobarea celor din jur, cu at\u00e2t pierdem contactul cu adev\u0103ratul nostru sine.\u201d Astfel, ajungem s\u0103 ne autosabot\u0103m \u0219i s\u0103 ne provoc\u0103m o durere imens\u0103.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Este necesar s\u0103 \u00een\u021belegem c\u0103 acest mecanism compensator nu face nimic altceva dec\u00e2t s\u0103 ascund\u0103 adev\u0103rata surs\u0103 a opresiunii. Prejudec\u0103\u021bile despre comunitatea LGBTQ+ s-ar putea s\u0103 nu dispar\u0103 niciodat\u0103, iar frica social\u0103 indus\u0103 de acestea poate fi dep\u0103\u0219it\u0103 doar prin acceptarea de sine.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Acceptarea este stadiul final \u00een procesul de vindecare a homofobiei internalizate. Aceasta presupune \u00eenfruntarea ru\u0219inii \u0219i renun\u021barea la sinele fals. \u00censeamn\u0103 c\u0103 nu ne mai \u00eenvinuim pentru ceea ce ni se \u00eent\u00e2mpl\u0103, ci recunoa\u0219tem cine este adev\u0103ratul opresor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00cen loc s\u0103 credem c\u0103 exist\u0103 \u201eprea mult b\u0103gat pe g\u00e2t,\u201d ar trebui s\u0103 \u00een\u021belegem c\u0103 societatea este dominat\u0103 de prejudec\u0103\u021bi care nu au nicio leg\u0103tur\u0103 cu noi. Doar \u00een acest fel putem \u00eembr\u0103\u021bi\u0219a ceea ce suntem \u0219i putem \u201eg\u0103si \u00een sf\u00e2r\u0219it lini\u0219tea \u0219i un sentiment de \u00eemplinire,\u201d a\u0219a cum afirm\u0103 Downs.<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u201eNu \u0219tiu dac\u0103 ai v\u0103zut deschiderea \u00een totalitate a Jocurilor Olimpice, sincer, asta a fost perebor (prea mult, n.r.) cu…<\/p>","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":6969,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[182,645,178],"tags":[904,905,655,706,198,197,292,297,207,199,906],"class_list":["post-6968","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-asa-nu","category-pride","category-queer-proud","tag-activism","tag-frica","tag-homofobia","tag-homofobia-internalizata","tag-lgbt-moldova","tag-lgbtq","tag-orientare-sexuala","tag-pride","tag-queer","tag-queer-moldova","tag-rusine-2"],"yoast_head":"\n| Editorial | \u201eBabe speriate \u0219i gay cumin\u021bi\u201d - cum homofobia ne afecteaz\u0103 pe to\u021bi - BANG-BANG<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"\u00cen loc s\u0103 credem c\u0103 exist\u0103 \u201eprea mult b\u0103gat pe g\u00e2t,\u201d ar trebui s\u0103 \u00een\u021belegem c\u0103 societatea este dominat\u0103 de prejudec\u0103\u021bi care nu au nicio leg\u0103tur\u0103 cu noi.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/bangbang.md\/ru\/2024\/09\/24\/editorial-babe-speriate-si-gay-cuminti-cum-homofobia-ne-afecteaza-pe-toti\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"ru_RU\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"| Editorial | \u201eBabe speriate \u0219i gay cumin\u021bi\u201d - 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